IZ Darehouse of DOOM!
by irkengirl
Summary: Invader Zim dareshow!
1. Intro!

A female Irken with bright green eyes walked on stage.

"Hello!" she greeted. "I am Li! I will be hosting a dareshow that is to be the greatest, most epic…

dareshow…

EVER! It is going to be epic! It is I tell you! It is! IT IS! IT IIIIIS!" the Irken screamed. "Now," she said, calming down, "let's introduce our darees!

"Don't forget me." Another female Irken, this one with dark purple eyes and black attire, walked over. "I'm Kolle, the representation of Invaderzimdibfan co-authoring this."

Li pouted. "But you're already _in_ Invaderzimdibfan's dareshow!" She whined.

Kolle shrugged. "I only get paid if I'm interesting." She said honestly. "Anyway, we still have to introduce the canon people.

"I'm introducing them!" Li butted in. "ME! Now let's see, there's…

…

…

…your favorite big-headed child, Dib!"

"MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!" Dib shouted as the audience cheered and laughed.

"Honestly, who even started that joke?" Kolle asked in confusion. She was ignored.

"Now," Li continued, "it's your favorite game-obsessed bottle of rage…

…

…

…Gaz!"

"Be quiet," Gaz mumbled, causing the entire audience to silence there applauds.

Li shrugged it off and continued. "Next, it's the two people all Irkens should know…

…

…

…'Almighty' Tallests Red and Purple!" Kolle whispered something to Li, who sighed. "We aren't shooting them yet." The green eyed Irken said, seemingly annoyed.

The tallest waved as the Irken audience cheered. "Thank you! Thank you!" Red announced.

Purple shoved Red aside, causing the audience to laugh. "Yes, look at me! I am awesome! I am way better than-"

Red shoved Purple over in the middle of his sentence, provoking more laughter from the audience. "Just ignore him! He's too immature for his own-" Red was interrupted by a slap to the face from Purple. The two Tallest started smacking at each other.

"GO SIT DOWN!" Li yelled, causing the Tallest to go to their chairs hesitantly. "It's the idiot robot you all love…

…

…

...GIR!"

"I GOT MONKEHZ IN MEH!" GIR screamed joyously, causing the audience to applaud and fangirl/fanguy.

"And last, but not least, your favorite invader of the Irken Empire…

…

…

…

…

…INVADER ZIM!"

"I AM ZIM AND I WILL RULE YOU ALL WITH AN IRON FIST! I'M NORMAL!" Zim screamed as the entire audience rose from their seats, applauding.

"Now, to explain the rules! You readers have to send dares in for different Invader Zim characters- Zim, GIR, Dib, Gaz, Skoodge -if you can think of an Invader Zim character, you can dare him/her! Now, for sending in your dares, I'll tell you what to do. It is recommended that you send in dares through PM, but if you must, you may send in dares through review."

"But flames will be used to roast marshmallows and the severed heads of our enemies." Kolle added emotionlessly.

"THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A K+ FIC!" Li screamed at Kolle. "So," she said, calming herself down once more, "SEND IN DARES OR I'LL INCINERATE YOU ALL WITH A DEATH LASER!" she screamed again.

"Oh yeah." Kolle smirked. "K+ for sure."

"BE QUIET! Can't wait for your dares to come!" Li said as she waved and went backstage.


	2. First Dares!

**Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim**

"Hello!" Li greeted. "We are back with some dares!"

"Yeah, sure, start with the dares. That'll get this some likes," Kolle mumbled darkly.

"BE QUIET!" Li snapped. "Now," Li said, much calmer, "first person is Cartoonspaz!" Li announced as the darer walked onstage.

"I dare Dib to hug Zim for a full hour."

"Mine," Li grumbled at Dib, grabbing Zim by the forehead. Dib was extremely confused by this.

"Oh, the pairings," Kolle chuckled.

Li glared, but ignored Kolle's remark. "Next is Aly Rose!" She happily announced as a blonde-haired girl with a pixie cut walked in.

"Zim, is Zim your full name?"

"YES! I AM ZIM AND I WILL RULE YOU ALL WITH AN IRON-"

"No one cares," interrupted a very irritated Kolle.

"I do," Li mumbled.

"Dib, what's the first number that comes to your head when I say mummies?" The darer asked, confusing our favorite big-head.

"Wha- Wh- Why?" Dib stared, wide-eyed.

"Just answer so we can get this over with," Kolle muttered.

"Uh…" Dib thought for a moment. "Six?"

"Gaz, how much pizza can you eat?"

"Not now," Gaz grumbled. "I'm- Wait, what did you say?"

"She asked you how much stupid peet-sah you can eat," Kolle stated.

"At once, about a box."

"GIR, how do you kill humans?"

"LIKE THIS!" GIR shouted as he ate Dib, creeping out everyone.

"Red, I love you. How do you feel about pie?"

"What's pie?" Red asked.

"Purple, I dare you and the rest of the Siemens in the room to eat a whole jalapeno."

"We don't know what a Siemen is, so next?" Li said.

"Tak, how old are you?"

"16 in Irken years," Tak said.

"Prof. Membrane, where is your wife?"

"W-Well, uh…" The professor said, shocked that anyone brought it up. "I AM A SCIENTIST!" He shouted to change the subject.

"Keef, is your hair naturally orange?"

"Will you be my friend?" Keef asked, oblivious to the fact that the darer asked a question.

"Shut up," Kolle said, shooting Keef with a laser.

"Kolle!" Li exclaimed. "...Thank you."

"Any time," the dark Irken muttered.

"Ms. Bitters, what are you?"

"Silence, you doomed child," she spat coldly.

"_Someone's _in a good mood." Kolle smirked.

"Letter M, do you have a crush on anyone?"

"W-Well, uh- um…" He stammered. He then ran away screaming. Everyone stared after him in confusion.

"Zita, do _you_ have a crush on anyone?" The darer continued after a long silence.

"No," Zita replied. "Everyone is crazy."

"Old Kid, how old are you?"

"1,497!" He replied, his voice hoarse.

"Li, monkeys or bananas?"

"Monkeys!" Li cheered happily as she hugged ten monkeys at once.

"Kolle, which male in the room do you like da most?"

"Dib, I suppose, if for no other reason than that he is enemies with Zim."

"Well, that's it for now!" Li said.

"Send dares to distract me from how horrible my life is," Kolle mumbled darkly.

Li, putting her face in her hands, just sighed. "Yes. Please send dares."


End file.
